Holding on to the hurt of the past doesn't help us. The pain of being harmed may initially teach us how to protect ourselves or those we love from people who do not have our best interest in mind, but after some time, we may build it up to be something that undermines the spirit. It's like the tumbling snowball that gains more and more snow- growing heavier and colder as it rolls downhill. I can picture an old, animated movie in mind right now- and know the giant snowballs that freeze inside our spirit- the ones that need to melt.
Sometimes the sadness and anger we harbor is founded, but it has a shelf life. It isn't meant to be nurtured and grown. Sometimes the disappointment and heartache is caused by someone or a circumstance that never meant to hurt us at all- that was well intentioned even. In that case, the rumination and wound is not only harmful, it is self-inflicted.
Letting go of the pain isn't always easy, but in time, we can offer forgiveness to the person or circumstances that created the pain for us. When we do, we can also acknowledge the choice we made to pay attention, to believe, to grow or to react to the incident in the first place. We have to forgive ourselves for believing it was necessary and for the time spent in discomfort.
One morning, recently, I woke up and knew the forgiveness I needed to offer was essential to my overall health. I am not one to harbor resentments often and I needed to move through it. If the forgiveness of the other person was to work for me, I needed to also offer myself the same. I communicated loving thoughts to myself and shared the words I needed to offer to an individual. I don't want others to be in pain or carry around wounds that I've added to. I want my sphere of influence to be a healing one. After sharing with the individual, I let go. This involves breathing, giving myself a hug, and applying my forgive oil. I went for a run. I meditated and I visualized both parties (myself and this individual) happier, healthier, more abundant. I pictured the person's face smiling- joyful. It felt good. It felt freeing.
At night, I knew there could be remnants of the stagnant energy. I reapplied forgive to my abdomen, my inner arms, wrist creases. I breathed it in. I thanked the universe and asked for continued healing and the removal of negative feelings around the circumstances. I asked for healing for the person involved in this situation- knowing full well that this person may or may not need it, but it is my highest intention to heal and to offer love. This person may never respond or offer the same to me. It doesn't matter.
So, today, I sit here and I can honestly say that I love myself a little bit more. I love myself a little bit better. I feel a lot freer because I gave this gift to myself. Forgiveness is worth it. You are worth it.
Who can you forgive today?
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Intuitive mother, writer, teacher, wellness coach, daughter, wife, friend and advocate for true belonging and self love.